Dr. Feelgood

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We called it the doctor

not knowing it would prove

to be the prescription for your demise.

Gentle violence, smoldering anger

tearing into your soul, shattering all hope.

Yet another victim

of wicked choices made in youth.

You more than paid the price David.

Stoic solitude

wisdom gained from the streets.

Imperfect prophet,

not a saint but no devil either.

Who can know your final thoughts

mysteries taken to a watery grave.

Swan dive into oblivion, fade to black.

There were moments

where salvation seemed possible

but in the end

the bony hand of death pulled you

beneath the surface.

Rest in Peace my friend.

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Kindness and love (Please watch the video)

Originally posted on johncoyote:

(Please watch then video.Will bring tear to your eyes and hope into your heart.)

             Kindness and love

A good life is giving without the need of reward.

Listen and ask questions  before your judging. All actions are not done for self-profit.

Lead with love and kindness. Love and kindness will create a river of hope and love.

Be the friend. Not the judge. All of us can fall and need someone to pick us up.

Coyote/John Castellenas

© 2014 Coyote Poetry

View original

soundtrack for the collapse of the empire.

Originally posted on UP!::urban po'E.Tree(s):

soundtrack for the collapse of the empire.

children of capitalism
do the dance of
waste and decadence.
dance for your forefathers-
the slaves and the owners,
the weak and wicked.
the shadows of light
are blinding in darkness

children of capitalism
your women are bitches
your men are all dogs
so then what are you?
if your mother’s a bitch,
and your father a dog,
so then what are you?

are you an american?
from the continent or
from the country?
there is no country america.
are you an orphan?
what are you?
we are children of capitalism-
confused, lost
because what will we do
when our money can’t buy
our salvation,
our freedom,
or worse, you run out
of money?

children of capitalism-
sons and daughters
of decadence,
the empire is crumbling,
so dance, dance, dance
and fuck, fuck, fuck.
we’re all screwed, screwed, screwed,
and in the end…

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The Lonely Blossom

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Heart filled with stillness

heavy air sinking slowly

to collect as dew

~~~

Quiet overtakes

with no need to speak my mind

hushed shadows drifting

~~~

Creamy white richness

stretching on towards the heavens

in a yogic pose

~~~

Perfect proportion

a direct testament to

nature’s harmony

~~~

The lonely blossom

reflects its peace on the pond

content to just be

~~~

Love’s bounty ripples

outwards with tranquility

a serene blessing

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One Small Touch

Originally posted on Eric Tonningsen's "Awakening to Awareness":

“Each time someone stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, they send forth a tiny ripple of hope.” ~ Robert F. Kennedy

Some, perhaps many of us, have learned: We did not have to do something amazing to initiate growth. A small action can go a long way. It doesn’t take a boulder to create a ripple effect in the water. A finger is enough. As everything is interconnected in life, we only need be brave enough to take the first, maybe very small step. Before we know it, we may realize that we are a ripple effect.

A ripple effect is a situation where, like the ever-expanding ripples across the water when an object is dropped into it, an effect from the initial state can be followed outward incrementally. Applied to our lives, everything we do and think…

View original 402 more words

Music of Angels

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The morning stillness
a blank canvas
to leave an imprint.

Unexplored wonders
yet to be revealed
through dawns amber hue.

Delicate petals unfurled
turn slowly towards
the warmth of light.

Music of Angels
elegantly composed
on silver lyre strings.

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Living Dead

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Where do my emotions go when I bury them?

The absence of feeling in me is the most painful of all.

Yearning for the hot blast of alive.

~~~

The Machine does not allow for variance.

Slotted, herded, controlled, cajoled.

Led to willful slaughter like so many sheep.

~~~

Mind numbing diversions distract attention.

Controlled monotony of dreary lives.

Corporatocracy is supersized.

~~~

Teleport through dimension and time.

Find the place where the quiet mind

can truly hear the wind.

~~~

Shed your soul of the extra layers.

Travel lightly on your journey.

Every step filled with intention.

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We Don’t

Originally posted on Kendra Lynn:

We don’t talk much
But we say so much
We don’t
Show it well
But we
Feel so much
Nodding
At all the appropriate times
Chiming in
With well played answers
Like wind chimes
High fiving
The few
All else
Falls askew
We don’t
Take the time
To notice
The little things
All just waiting
For the bigger things
I just wonder
If
We don’t sing
Who sings?

View original

BTFD

You all already know where I think this market is headed. However, the twitter streams are full of folks that are ready to declare yet another rally to new higher plateaus. Most investors don’t seem overly concerned about things. I certainly have not detected any real panic in either the sentiment readings or in the price action of the market.

There are still some pretty serious technical issues afflicting the market that have not been alleviated by the recent pullback. A myriad of indicators such as Put/Call ratios, Bullish Percentage indicators, volume studies, et cetera, are indicating weakness to come. I believe that the path of least resistance is to lower prices, and that the process has begun. Those are my personal opinions however, and that plus $3.50 will get you a Grande Soy Latte at Starbucks.

Anything is possible short term in this era of daily Central Bank injections of “monetary morphine” in the form of POMO. This stock market “crack” is in essence creating yet another asset bubble, this time through mispriced risk premiums in both equities and bonds. The chase for yield in a lower bound interest rate environment is the catalyst, but that is not the topic of today’s post.

You see, bubbles can go on for longer than even the most stubborn contrarian may be able to wait. Timing such reversals is treacherous at best and suicidal at worst. That’s not my point either. My topic du jour is of the incredibly obvious, yet to-date not talked about fact that the Fed’s open market operations since 2009 have created a unique moral hazard. This will act as dry tinder to the next real correction in the markets, whenever that may happen – and it WILL happen.

In the study of Psychology there is a theory of operant conditioning that was formulated by B.F. Skinner. Skinner’s theories were based on principles such as reinforcement, punishment, and extinction. Skinner created experiments using rats that would provide positive and negative stimuli creating learned behavior responses.  His Law of Effect was in essence that responses producing a satisfying effect in a particular situation become more likely to occur again, and responses producing a discomforting effect become less likely to occur again.

I would argue that the Fed has done the same with us folks in the investor class. Just like rats we are conditioned that buying any dip no matter how small will be rewarded with profits. Conversely, selling stock short or betting on stock prices to fall will be punished with severe losses. This keeps the herd moving in the same direction, but it inflates the bubble higher and higher. This learned behavior response is manifested in two phenomena currently observable in today’s financial markets: BTFD and Pavlovian Short Covering (let’s call it PSC for shorthand). Unless you have been underneath a rock in the fetal position since 2009 then you already know what BTFD stands for, but if not I’ll tell you here.

BTFD stands for Buy the Fucking Dip. The first time I saw it referenced was in a YouTube video that appeared at least a few years ago. Since then, BTFD has become somewhat of an accepted truth. After all, anybody that has bought ANY dip of ANY size over the last 4 years has made money with very few exceptions. BTFD has certainly made many of its disciples very rich and that is one of the strongest positive reinforcements a human can receive. Not only does it reinforce the behavior in the initial participants, but it has created a tractor beam of groupthink. As more and more people have benefited from the learned behavior, the strength of belief has spread far and wide and its practitioners have been emboldened.

The flip side of the reinforced behavioral response is Pavlovian Short Covering. This is the act of reflexively covering short positions at the first sign of a return of strength to the bull side. This learned behavior is based on negative stimulus exerted upon bears time after time over the last 4 years. The tactics used to elicit this PSC is mainly through extreme, and some would say purposeful, manufactured violent short squeezes. Often these bear traps are sprung in the dead of night. Index futures rise in overnight trading creating a rush to cover short positions into the opening bell. Other times at key moments when the market is threatening to roll-over, there is an almost “magical” news item that comes out creating the squeeze. Sometimes, there’s no news at all, but a certain mysterious “hand of the Patron Saint of Bulltards” comes in and ramps the futures from certain failure. This hand of God typically lifts price up and past key areas where bears generally cover their short bets to avoid further and certain excruciating pain.

Any and all of these scenarios trigger PSC, and once it begins, a feedback loop comprised of weak handed short sellers and conditioned dip buyers combine into a glorious symphony of Federal Reserve operant conditioned rats.

Now this is all fine and good until somebody pokes an eye out. This conditioning is based on experience and results that have been extremely effective in the bull-run off the 2009 S&P lows. At SOME POINT however, (I would say that point has already arrived, but some will disagree) the trend changes, and the great Bernanke Bubble pops.

When this happens, the extreme conditioning response cultivated over the past 4+ years will serve to exacerbate the eventual declines. Initially bulls will not sell their positions when the market weakens and may instead continue to aggressively buy the dip. After all this has worked like a charm in the past – why change now? Bears on the other hand, gun shy and wary of all of the relentless traps, will not be eager to short, thus creating no fuel for squeezes.

Combine all this with the fact that there are currently many crowded trades due to the narrowing participation of stocks to the recent rally (see Market Halitosis for more on this). If things turn south the low volume on the exchanges will make declines more severe. Also, there is the very real possibility that if things get really ugly then the High Frequency bid will evaporate, further lowering liquidity. Thus the unique set of stimuli creating these learned responses will eventually be the fuel that enables real conflagration to erupt. This will be the point that everyone realizes that the new phrase to learn is STFR or Sell the Fucking Rip.

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Refusing to See

 

Refusing to See

They all turned away,

refusing to see

clear signals.

Hubris and ego,

recency and complacency.

~~~

Stop and think for

one moment.

~~~

Understand where we have

come from and where

we are headed.

~~~

History never repeats,

but it rhymes.

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These Are The Times

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Shimmering radiance
of full moons glow.

Never more alive than
those moments when

I peel back the layers
of rote habit.

Prodding my inner core,
allowed to feel

my real emotions.
Not protected but

at least I am not dulled.
These are the times

that I feel connected,
universal.

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The Island

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View of Alcatraz taken from the Bay Bridge

 

Heavy inversion layers

tamped down emotions

solitude of thought.

~~~

Days like these weigh on my soul

testing my psyche

in ways you can’t know.

~~~

Where does the self doubt come from?

Was it there since birth,

or learned behavior?

~~~

On an island in my mind,

watching the waves lap

and envelop me.

~~~

The sun tries hard to break free

 Focused beams puncture

through the mist and shine.

~~~

If only I can absorb

the sun’s loving rays

deeply in my heart

~~~

I can learn to love again.

The lessons of life

that guide me to peace.

 

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A Silence So Loud it Hurts

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Grey mist replaces what once was bright.

A Silence So Loud It Hurts

A silence so loud it hurts.
Bottomless depths,
absence of light.

Drawing all feeling towards you.
Black hole gravity pull
will never relent.

What will be left when I am gone?
Echoes of us
shadows of love.

Colors drain from the picture.
Grey mists replace
what once was bright.

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In The Arms Of Mother

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Held closely
in the arms of mother nature.
Her watchful gaze,
like a warm embrace that surrounds me.

Nothing bad
can happen here, you at my side.
Constant presence
guides me, providing gentle comfort.

Blowing breeze
swirling up through the canyon walls.
Calling to me
with the beautiful song of your love.

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Impressions of Her

Impressions of Her

Impressions of her

indelibly painted,

sweeping expanding images.

~~~

Savoring the time

never knowing.

Grace comes and goes.

~~~

Could a dream

be what I saw?

How can I know for certain?

~~~

With every shared whisper,

every exchanged glance,

her essence gains gravity.

~~~

Until she appears

before me.

As if by my side

for eternity.

 

 

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Weekend Charts: Reality Check

MaxxPayme:

This is a well articulated case for some type of market correction soon. I encourage you to read this post if you are interested in technical analysis.

Originally posted on NorthmanTrader:

reality-checkDespite playing a bear on twitter for a while now I’m primarily a trader who seeks out good risk/reward entries and exits. I can’t influence the macro and so there is really no point in raving against it. Yet my bearish view on the macro remains informed by a relatively solid understanding of the workings of finance, capital investment, economics, debt, and currencies on the one hand and a long studied view of how society at large is evolving. And the picture continues to deteriorate despite the many claims to the contrary. This bull market remains one of central banks who will never leave, buybacks at all time high prices to augment failing organic growth and algos chasing stops. It is a system based on liquidity excess and while i’m looking forward to trade from the long side the risk/reward is not favorable until some of this excess has been…

View original 1,117 more words

What is Love

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Love is having someone to run their fingers through your hair while you sleep.

Love is completely messing up and still receiving forgiveness.

Love is long walks together in silence.

Love is a big hug that never wants to end.

Love is willingly putting the other before yourself.

Love is multiple trips to the hardware store to get that project done.

Love is missing the other in their absence.

Love is not wanting to be anywhere else but right next to your lover.

Love is passionate disagreement, and make up sex afterwards.

Love is sacrifice.

Love is compromise.

Love is acceptance.

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Do you REALLY have a disorder???

MaxxPayme:

Well written post about a topic that hits close to home for me personally. My own struggles with adhd have impacted my life but right now I have chosen not to treat my condition with medication.

Exercise and therapy are my current methods of trying to manage. While not always successful, I prefer not to succumb to over-medication.

Originally posted on Coffee & Conversation :

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By Kenneth Justice

What does it mean to have a disorder?

According to a psychotherapist I had coffee with recently, “children who are hyperactive should be tested for having ADD or ADHD”.

And how do you identify that the child is hyperactive?” I asked

Well, children who have a difficult time sitting at their desk in school, or staying focused on the task at hand would be examples of hyperactivity” she said

To which I ask….REALLY???

For years I have been challenging the way we live in Western Society; I think many elements of our culture suck;

—-) Too much time is spent in front of the television

—-) Too much time is spent in automobiles

—-) Too many doctors are prescribing pharmaceutical drugs like candy

And,

—-) Not enough time is spent focusing on healthy eating habits

—-) Not enough time is…

View original 868 more words

Hidden Treasures

hidden treasures

hidden treasures

 

Hidden Treasures

What you keep

hidden away from view

is the summation

of all that is beautiful

in you.

~~~

Your special smile

and what you do,

a beauty that lies below

that precious few knew.

~~~

Poise and warmth

a glance askew

make me feel cheerful

as seldom do.

~~~

On this day

you must not be blue.

Warm greetings and hugs,

happy birthday to you!

~~~

I promised my co-worker who is one of those “talk about my birthday for months before it comes” types that I would give her a special gift on her birthday. Well, this is the best I could do, hope you like it!

Happy Birthday Mercedes.

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Child of Mother Earth

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The full moon pulls

exacting it’s revenge

for having been separated

From Mother Earth.

~~~

Emotion runs strong

blood courses through

look to the heavens

for answers to your prayers.

Tides recede eventually.

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Mother

For my obligatory mothers day post here is the video of the epic Pink Floyd song Mother.
Sometimes our relationships with our parents can be complicated. This song encapsulates this dynamic plus it’s just a great song.

Enjoy the day! Peace.

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A San Francisco View to Remember

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Shot of Golden Gate Bridge as seen from across Fulton Street

This picture of the Golden Gate Bridge was captured while I was out on a long walk last week.

What makes this picture interesting is that it was taken from across a major thorofare and this little sliver of a view would normally not even be noticed or appreciated if you were in your car driving.

There were many other great pictures from this walk that I may put together for another post but enjoy this slice of San Francisco for now.

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What is it that you desire most?

I am certain that many of you have already seen this video but it encapsulates the essence of what I am trying to cultivate in myself. The attitude that my individual actions can radiate and have a ripple effect. I hope that you take a moment to watch this and let it’s message sink in.

Peace to you all.

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Steps to Take

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Ascension to crest the summit

takes efforts borne not on wings.

Gradual progress is needed

steady plodding steps.

~~~

 Lessons need to be learned

control must be applied.

Discipline and self awareness

are keys to progress.

~~~

With time my goals will be met.

By embracing the challenge

the task will seem less arduous.

~~~

Belief and faith can lighten my burden

but friends and family can only lend a hand.

In the end it is my road alone,

my steps to take.

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Sorrow So

MaxxPayme:

Since I have been a bit busy of late without too much opportunity to post regularly I have reblogged a selection from Kendra Ballasteros’ blog. She is a gifted poet who deserves a try if you have not read her words. You can also find her eloquent poetry on Twitter:
@divorcequeen

Cheers! MP

Originally posted on Kendra Lynn:

So I let the sorrow
set in like a sharp,
pointed arrow. I wallowed
in it & swam in my own
tears. I felt the crush of
a thousand worrisome
thoughts & sat in them
for some time. They’re mine.
Opening the door meant this too
must enter – in order for the release.
Palpable shadows as I led myself
to the gallows. Giving it away I can only pray. But a funny thing happened as my reality crashed in. The sorrow brushed my cheek for but a moment
and left again.

View original

The Flying Dutchman

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Image courtesy of http://www.picstopin.com

 

Churning currents violent

undertow. Surface calm

frigid green depth.

~~~

Briny choking pressures

filling nostrils, exploding

tears of pain.

~~~

Buried treasures, murky

leagues.

~~~

Solitude my companion,

my shipmate.

 

 

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Confidence to Spare (change)

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Image courtesy of BrainyQuote.com

When I am feeling a bit out of sorts about life I need a sense of perspective. There is much to be thankful for in life but occasionally we all need a reminder about what truly matters and where we all fit into the greater scheme of things. My self worth has taken a few beatings of late and it is easy to lose confidence.

Confidence has never been a strong suit for me. This, despite all evidence to the contrary.

Saying this because at times in my life I have put up a facade that fooled many into believing that I had my shit together and that I was confident, if not cocky. People have been drawn to me at times and on the surface I seem to be fine. People like me.

Lies, all lies I tell you. Over the past year therapy uncorked the bottle that contained my true emotions and the stench that has bubbled out is a true testament to the lack of confidence that I have lived with.

The human mind plays terrible tricks at times. Fooling us into believing that we have no ability, when we are able. Or that we are unlovable when we are in fact loved.

Confidence falls prey to these cognitive slights of hand as well and if you were never given confidence from a young age it can be a hard belief to instill later on.

One method I am using to combat this tendency of mine to lack confidence is a process called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT. This is the act of logging your negative thoughts and emotions using a process called a thought record.

After your negative thoughts are recorded, the process calls for going back and examining them. Providing facts to support and refute. You start to realize how much your thinking can become skewed and how far from truth that perceptions can stray.

Another method I use to combat my lack of confidence is to volunteer as well as to give to the less fortunate. This works for me because I get that crucial perspective about how much I have going for me.

Even when I feel inadequate I am not only worthy but able to effect positivity in others through my actions.

As an example, the other day I was getting some vegetables at the produce market down the block. As I was walking home with my bag full of food a homeless woman with a worn paper cup asked if I could spare some change. I knew I had some coins from the change from my purchases so I stopped and started digging them out.

During this time, she mentioned that she was begging in order that she could raise a few dollars for something that she needed. I stopped and listened to her and empathized with her. Telling her I understood that times are tough and then I gave her the money she needed which was not a big deal.

What happened next was, however. She looked at me with surprise at my gift to her and smiled wide. She said:

“I like you, you are good. Can I give you a hug?”

And hug we did. It was a lovely exchange and I got the feeling she got as much from the human touch and interaction with me as she did the money that I gave her.Her spirits were uplifted and so were mine. Immediately I felt better about myself and about my place in the world.

That homeless woman and her hug not only gave me confidence in myself, it let me know that I had confidence to spare.

 

 

 

 

 

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Summer Remembrances Of The Yuba River

The Yuba river

The Yuba river

 

Shadows stretch languidly
fluid rivulets groove into granite.
Time passes with no words.

Echoes reverberate against box canyon walls.
Foam spray on mossy stones.
Driftwood collects in swirling eddies.

Dappled stars twinkle and dance on waters surface.
Scent of pine duff wafts.
Calm pools teem with life as
water skeeters flit and skip about.

Breathy breezes and puffy clouds.
Cans of cheap beer chill at rivers edge.
Eyes closed but calming ripples
fill my mind.
Falling deeply into summers trance.

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Soothing Hues of Grey

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Mists blow on high.
Rustling leaves,
morning’s quiet blankets.

Soft melodies stir
unbroken loops
in my mind.

Soothing hues of grey.
Calmness and peace
wrapped in embrace.

Never to release.
Forever in your arms,
secure in love.

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